Sunday, March 18, 2012

The only thing to fear is fear itself

As I've gotten older I've discovered that I've developed new fears....most of them are irrational and revolve around something happening to my family.  Other than things happening to me or my family, I have four fears.  They are snakes, clowns, needles, and thunderstorms.  When I was younger I truly believed that when a thunderstorm came it was because God was punishing me for some sin.  I would rack my brain for what I had done.  I will admit that sometimes that thought still comes now that I'm older, but now it causes me to chuckle :P 

The other night there was a thunderstorm.  A very loud rippling clap of thunder woke up Anna and I.  This year she has decided that she needs mom when she is woken up by thunderstorms.  She came into my room and wanted to sleep on the couch in our room.  I didn't really want to clean it off, so I told her she could come snuggle with me.  She actually fell asleep there until the storm was over.  I sent her back to her room. 

The next morning I was thinking about the previous night.  It feels so good to be thought of as a safe place.  Anna coming to me shows me that she feels as though she can trust me and that she knows that I will do my best to protect her and comfort her.  If I feel that good, I can't imagine how God feels when we will run to him with our fears or problems.  He is there at all times and is in control of everything.  Does that mean He will keep my fears away from me....no....but he will provide me everything that I need in the situation.  He can provide peace that passes understanding.  He will walk with me through my fears. Even though I hope with all my heart that both of my children will always feel that they can come to me with any fear or problem or joy or anything, I have a bigger hope that I can train them to go to the One who holds more power than I.

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